Places to go; Things to see

Sunday, July 31, 2011

AWOL

Yep, that's what I've been.

Not a lot to report actually. It is the end of July; I have two months till I fly off to Paris and I am holding stead on 115kg. I have a feeling I have stretched my pouch a little as I have noticed in the last few weeks that I am eating more and more. I am even eating in the mornings and that is something I have rarely ever done since I have had my last few fills.

We all now what that means :o)

Yep... the 5 day pouch test. It will hopefully get my pouch back in proper working order. I am also going to call my surgeon and make an appointment. I will need to see him before I go overseas. I am thinking of having the band loosened a little before I go so that I don't have any problems overseas.

I know it could possibable lead to weight gain, but I am going to be very active while away, so I am going with the plan of being active enough to counter act the extra food intake. Plus I want to enjoy my holiday and know I will be fine... Can you tell I am trying to talk myself into it :o)

In another bid in favour of an un-fill is that if I am being totally honest with myself, I think I am just a little over filled.

But only if I am if I am being totally honest.

Any other time and I think I am just right. I can eat about 1/2 a cup of food, and it keeps me full for ages. As long as it is solid protein. And even this much will make me really full for a while after I have eaten. I guess I have been pushing it too much lately. Winter months and hot food, just makes me think of the old days when I would just eat and eat and eat. I know the fewer calorie intake is one of the reasons why we feel the cold a lot more now, but I hadn't thought about the vast quantity of food I used to eat in a while.

I have been thinking about old trends because I have been subconsciously falling back into those habits.

Instead of the big bag of corn chips with dips, I now eat a bag of twistes zig zags, light and airy, taking up no room at all in a limited space that is my pouch :(

No more of that, and no more of the self pity.... I promise :o)

Personal Challenge for tomorrow... Liquids, liquids and more liquids. Day one it all good to go.....

Monday, July 18, 2011

Doh!!!!!!

On Sunday I had lunch with the Lapband Support group here in Brisbane and we were talking about the gym and how I was trying to learn to run. I was boosting about the fact that while I was not having a lot of success getting past the stage were I jog for 30 seconds and walk for 1 minute and 30 seconds. I was not having any problems with my knees.

I am amazed at the difference between when I weighted 120kg and now that I weigh 115-117kg (depending on the day), I haven't had any problems with the run program, and if I could stay on the gym program for more than two weeks at a time I am sure I would be able to run further.

After lunch when I got home, I thought I should go to the gym, talking about it had reminded me that I had not been in a few days and that I wanted to do that run program. I did it, along with some weights and a good long stretch.

Well.

When I cooled down, I noticed a bit of pain in my right shin, it got worse through out the night and all today, if I was sitting still too long, it got really sore.

I think it is the early signs of shin splints. From what I have read on the net, the pain is similar, and it is relieved if I give my calf a good stretch. Go figure. that's what I get for boasting about not having any problems with running. At least it wasn't my knees!!!

I am planning lots of stretches, and a few days off the treadmill. The main problem I think was that I didn't warm up enough before I started jogging. Too eager to go a good session at the gym after a lovely lunch and band friendly conversations.

I'll have to use the bike at the gym instead, which is a good thing, because I am thinking of getting one to ride to and from the station; so I should get some practise in and see if I can actually ride the bike on a daily basis.

Other than that, I'm doing well. My daily challenges are going okay, as long as I stay away from baning the chocolate. If I stay away from that one; I am more likely to not eat chocolate. If I challenge myself to have no chocolate; than before my work day is over I have had it and am looking for more. One of these days I will learn. Tomorrow it is to go to the Body Combat Class at the gym, There isn't too much running in that class, so it should be fine on my leg.

I just finished making a very yummy ham and chick pea soup, so I have healthy lunches for the rest of the week. Although my biggest struggle is when I finish work and am facing the 1 hour train trip home, it takes a lot of will power to not buy a chocolate bar for the train home. 

What can I say, I am such a work in progress. It sometimes gets beyond a joke, but I am trying each and every day.

Hope everyone else had a great Monday :o)

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Small goals & an Award

Yep, you ladies are fantastic :o) Thanks to all of you and I know it has helped me a lot.

I stuck to my small challenge to myself. I went to the gym. I did 20min on the treadmill - learning to run, Than I did a body attack class. 854 calories burned in just over an hour :o) That was a great workout to put paid on that challenge.

I am going to stick to small challenges for a while, just to make sure I am honest with myself, and give myself a chance.

So tomorrow I want to challenge myself to go to the gym again. I need to work on consistency, so to the gym again is a start that I need.

Award time :o)
Thanks so much to Amanda for this cute award. I love it.

Now the rules are:

1. Thank the person who gave you this award and link back to them in your post
 
2. Tell us 10 things about yourself
 
3. Nominate your bloggers
 
4. Contact these bloggers and let them know you have nominated them
Ten Things About Me
  • I was nervous about cutting my hair off, afraid I wouldn't like it, but I love it!!
  • My cat Charlie Brown, loves to sit on my lap when it is NOT convenient for me, like when I am trying to type.
  • I have a serious DVD problem - I just have too many, but I love them all.
  • I can read nothing but vampire books at the moment. I am hooked.
  • I went and saw Saltimbanco on Saturday night. I love the Cirque de Soleil shows. I want to go to Las Vegas so that I can see all the permanent shows that they have there.
  • I love playing Super Mario Bros on my Wii
  • I am thinking of getting a bike so that I can ride to and from the station
  • I hate the cold, have you noticed that from my previous posts :o)
  • Ads on TV frustrate the heck out of my, sometimes enough that I will turn off a favourite show.
  • I am starting to feel that I am able to get back on track with my journey!!!
I am going to nominate Cat and Manda, cause I love their support and blogs.

 I hope you all have a great Hump Wednesday. Cheers

Monday, July 11, 2011

What am I doing???

I have to wonder what the hell I am doing...

There is a something not right with me that I am not able to follow through. I had a quick glance through blog titles and it brings back memories of all my plans that I was wanting to follow through with, and then they just fizzled.

The challenges that I signed up for and started out really well and then stopped doing so well.
The plans to get back on track with a jump start diet or pouch test and then no follow through.
The exercise schedules to help me get to goal, and then I stop going.

I never follow through.

I'm up to week eight on this 12WBT but I am just skating through at the moment. I have not been exercising and not following the diet, and I have only just been losing little amounts. I have such high hope at the beginning of each week and then nothing.

I can blame the lack of exercise of the bout of flu and lingering cough as much as I want, but I am still not exercising, and I have started to wonder if it is just an excuse that I am using. I need to just go do the exercise and see what happens.

Which is all fine for me to say that now as the gym is closed and the night is getting late. The real test will be tomorrow. I need to be up at 4am and out the door for work by 5am. I finish at 2pm and then have an hour's trip home. It will be 3:30pm before I am even able to get ready to go to the gym, that is when the real test will come.

It is one last challenge I am setting myself. I have to follow through with this challenge to myself, or why am I even trying.

I went through a lot to get banded. I had to face a lot of my own fears to even admit that I needed help to lose weight. I needed to face my family and friends with my inability to handle it. I had to go under the knife to get this band. I was so scared at the time, but I got through that and I recovered just fine.

Now I need to work the band and stop making excuses.

And even as I type this I feel like such a hypocrite. I had a whole bag of peanut butter m&m's tonight. Maybe that is the guilt behind this post. I eat chocolate and then feel so guilty about it, it drives me to plead my case one more time.

I want to thank everyone for your comments, and I am very sorry that I have not been commenting or reading as much  as I should have. I fell into the self pity party where I wasn't reading and posting like I should have been. You lovely ladies offer all this support and I crave it, but it is hard to reciprocate when you feel like a failure. Lately I have been faking it, hoping that will get me through. It hasn't been working. So my new strategy is to MEAN it.

Something that was done at the beginning of the year was to think of a word for 2011, something that we can hang on to through out the year. I have not done that.

Mine was:
That is what I have failed to do. I have failed to believe in myself and my ability to succeed in my journey.
I believe that I can do this.
I believe that I deserve this.
I believe I can make my dreams come true.

I believe I would not have gotten this far with out this blog and your support. I look forward to continuing the journey with a more positive outlook :o)

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Harping on at the cold

Yep!!! I survived the weigh in. I saw a loss :o)

Down to 115.3kg (255.3lb)

Amazingly, that was a loss of 1.2kg, I have no idea how that happened, but I am not questioning it. So far this week I have been pretty good on the food mark. I made a delicious and healthy chick pea and ham soup on Sunday and have had that for lunch at work. Very yummy!!!

Great on these wintery days here in Brisbane. I am still feeling the cold very much, more so then most people around me. On the days I wear my uniform to work I usually have a scarf on all day and at times use a ravel blanket over my knees - looks great and very fashionable....not! On Fridays when we can wear free dress, I usually have my long johns on under a pair of jeans and a thermal shirt so that I am warm. Sounds silly, but it looks okay and it is the one day of the week that I get to be warm all day :o)

Happy warm thoughts is that I need to concentrate on... but I am still planning my trip of a lifetime. And that means England and France in October, so that is Autumn. the temps range from lows of 7 or 8 degrees Celsius (46 to 48 Fahrenheit) to highs of 18 to 20 Celsius (64 to 68 Fahrenheit)

Those are not happy warm thoughts. Those are the thoughts that I have been dealing with lately, although our highs have been a little higher lately.

So the happy warm thoughts are more like excited and happy chilly thoughts, so that is nearly the same :o)

Speaking of which I am starting the planning process. I am borrowing the great travel planning skills of a friend at work. B has done a fair bit of travelling herself, and loves organising more. She is going to help a huge amount and I know I will owe her big time. I will definitely be bringing her home a special souvenir home :o)

I do know this, I am going to Disneyland in Paris!!!!! I can't wait, I have always wanted to go to the Disney park lands ever since I knew what they were; and since it doesn't look like they are going to build one in Australia any time soon, I have to go over seas to go to one.... any excuse ;o)

So it looks like we will be arriving into Paris and then go straight over to London, do England first and then France before ending in Paris before flying back out. Four very hectic, very fun packed weeks of discovery and adventure.

Okay, I am off again :o) More planning, healthy eating, and hopefully a gym visit or two to put in place :o)

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Wondering about tomorrow and England

Yep, tomorrow is a weigh in day and I am wondering.

First off, I just want to thank all you lovely ladies for your comments and continual support. I don't know what I'd do with out your support. And thanks for all the comments on my hair, I am still loving it!!

I used to weight in un-officially every morning, but lately, that has not really worked as the difference from day to day is just to great. I have a feeling it could be water related. only because I have started to notice that I have not been drinking enough, so the days that that I have had enough I notice the scale is down, compared to when I haven't had enough.

I think I have been having enough during the day, but at nights, I tend to slacken off. A few reasons being that I hate having to get up during the night due to late glasses of water, and not being able to drink for at least an hour or so after dinner.

Now with the 12WBT, I have not been exercises - this cough has still been bothering me, and I have not wanted to aggravate the situation. And while I have not been following the meal plans, I have been following the calorie limits each day, so I am hoping that that has been enough for at least a small loss this week.

What I have been thinking about lately is the Trip of a Lifetime :o)

It's only about three months away and I have nothing organised. I really wish I was better at planning and organising. I just can't make any final decisions on where and what I want to do. I search the Internet endlessly and it just confuses me more.

I have enlisted the aid of a co-worker who is great at this sort of thing. I am hoping she will be able to get be started in the right direction.

So that is me for now.  Back soon :o)